stupid

Im trying my best to please people.
Trying my best to make people happy.
And I guess its making me happy too.

These past few days has been ok.
OK because I didnt talk to Josh.
I know it is not wise to talk to him but I have to talk to him.
Im so used to him. Talking to him.
4 year's a long time.
Yes,of course Im hurt that he lied to me and cheated on me when all the while I was loyal to him.
What the hell? Im hurt big time!
Ive got all the reason in the world to be hurt.
He lied to me. He still is.
I really dont know why Im still putting up with his lies.
God.This makes me stupid.